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I’m watching a show tonight, and in the promo for the next show they hype it by saying “with a twist you’ll never see coming.”  Ummm…I will now.

Stupid advertising fuckhead!

The thing that makes twists cool is that you DON’T see them coming.  When you decide to include that phrase in your ad/promo, you are basically fucking up the twist.  Now, people will spend the whole show/movie trying to figure out what the twist is instead of just being blown away by the twist.

You wouldn’t think I would need to point shit like this out.

Is the Twitter fad almost over yet?

Some dude on the net, defending Twitter, said “No-one can force you to read anything. They can’t spam you like email (even the direct messages on twitter are blocked if you’re not following the person trying to message you), and you can “unfollow” someone just as easily as you “followed” them in the first place.”

The problem is that DAILY, many times a day no less, I have to listen to some asshole tell me about his Twitter account, or tell me to follow him or his employer on Twitter, or tell me about his Tweets, or whatever other asinine bullshit they just HAVE to share with me about Twitter.  If it weren’t for these asshats, I could just ignore it and not give a shit.

The NFL Network’s Total Access is one of my favorite shows, but has become almost unwatchable.  I think the NFL must own a piece of Twitter as much as they talk about it on that show.  That jerkoff Rich Eisen started it all with his constant babbling about his Twittering.  He sounds like like the dorky kid in school trying way too hard to impress the cool kids.  And now that tool Eisen has infected the others.  Just for the hell of it, I decided to track how much Twitter has invaded this once fine show.  From today’s episode:

3:10 into the show – Fran Charles tells us to make sure that we follow NFL Network on Twitter.

12:08 – The update crawl at the bottom of the screen tells us to follow the NFL Network on Twitter.

18:32 – Fran Charles tells us that we have now reached the point of the show that has people “tweeting” all across the nation, the segment called “What’s The Buzz?” with NFL V.P. of Business Operations, John Buzzeo.

19:39 – Fran asks Buzzeo if people are still hitting him up on Twitter.

19:49 -  Buzzeo remarks about how many people each week start following him on Twitter.

20:03 – Buzzeo talks about how many tweets say that he’s been too hard on Fran Charles.  We then see someone’s tweet posted up on the screen.

20:09 – Fran states that he might have to get his own Twitter account now.

20:34 – Buzzeo is now talking about a contest he is running.  Fans were to send him tweets about why they should get to come to the NFL League Office.  He then announces the winners and shows their tweets on the screen.

45:15 – The update crawl at the bottom of the screen again tells us to follow the NFL Network on Twitter.

Holy shit!  They normally have a Tweet of the Day, but mercifully we were spared.  And if that knob Eisen would have been on today’s show it would have been even worse.

I tune in to get football news, not listen to people babbling on like little schoolgirls.  Give it a rest already and just tell me about football.

Fuck Twitter already!